Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
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