I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
Randomize