new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
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