Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
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