You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
I have feelings that need drinking.
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
Randomize
