Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
Randomize
