my best friend tried to rape me with a pineapple
Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
