I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
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