"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
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