Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
Are we still banned from the library?
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
Randomize
