Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Randomize
