Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
Randomize
