I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
