So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
It's blow job season.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
My day in three words: secret purse cake
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
