do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
Randomize
