We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
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