i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize
