She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
That's how pantless uber rides happen
I am mentally ready for anal.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
