you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
