my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
My dick has a subreddit
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
