So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Randomize
