I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
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