Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
Randomize