I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
I am naked and annoyed.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
