Bisexual people are plain selfish.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
You are a genius and a whore.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
True college students do jello shots in the library
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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