Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
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