Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Randomize