The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
