I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
