dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
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