I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
