Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
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