i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
So much Jack, so little girl.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
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