I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
