Heard at work: Get out of my face before I cuntpunch you so hard your granddaughters have miscarriages. I love my job.
I'm moving there. Get me hired.
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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