What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize