Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
Randomize
