Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
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