she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
Randomize
