Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
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