Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Randomize
