don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Randomize
