if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Randomize
