There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize