Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
