Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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