dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
Randomize
