The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
