you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
Randomize
