i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
Thanks for FaceTime'ing with that ugly chick last night while me and her friend were in the other room. it's good to know I can still count on my wingman even when we're 2000 miles apart
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
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