What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Randomize